Jobs/Dates.

Job searching takes bravery. It's a lot like asking someone on a date (And I say that in the very general, societal form of "date" - dinner or something). I haven't ever asked someone on a date before, but this is how I imagine it would go.

Just like Facebook, you'd probably put your best foot forward. I don't think this is what dating should look like in its entirety - the deepness of the heart is far more important. Often, however, this is how the world tags it. First, time is spent searching, sifting through the options. Or maybe you'd just wait, and opportunity would knock. After that, you pose a question - make sure your clothes fit nicely, be sincere and true, actually do your hair in the morning (I suppose this is different depending on if you're a man or a woman - culture has all sorts of requirements). This is where a lot of the courage building happens. Breathe a lot, try to push the adrenaline down, eye contact. What if I walk into a wall or trip while we're talking? There's lint in my pocket. I can feel it. I like your hair? No, too much.

And then the question's out - hovering on the air, buoying around the room like smoke, and you're trying desperately to grab on to it or fasten yourself to something. Stay charming.

And then, no one says anything. Just blinking. There's awkward silence - what does this mean? Now I have a bunch of sweaty, lint balls rolled up in my pocket. Real brave. Cooool. I'm doing greaaat. 

This is what submitting resumes is like.

A real writer is a writer who is critiqued. This major is all about constructive criticism. Depending on the type of writing you do, it requires a good deal of vulnerability and honesty, and a writer needs to be open to straightforward evaluation, even if it's scary. Last night I "dated" an internship, began the process, and started submitting my credentials, references, writing samples, etc. All of my best foot is forward right now, and I'm just hanging in the air, waiting for a response. Even so, I want to be an honest applicant just as I'd want a company to be honest with me about a position. Both corporations and people have flaws. I'm trying to rework some pieces I've written, edit, check grammar. I have some friends and professors who are a sweet relief to me and help me pick and choose and redraft papers and articles. All of this is like I just asked someone out or something.

I like thinking about the future - I'm a dreamer, and sometimes it's hard for me to stay grounded in the present and think about logistics. I get excited pretty easily, and frankly, all of these internship and job possibilities are thrilling. It's especially nice to think about going grocery shopping more than once every two months - lately it's been all about peanut butter, cheese, and coffee.

So I guess we'll see what doors open up. Waiting and hoping for now.

Yours just dated,

Lo